Walk to class, not down the aisle

Von Lanier

Most millennials would agree that meeting your future spouse in college is the best case scenario, but few would say marrying in college is a good idea.

Currently, marriage rates for people in the age group of 18 to 30 in the U.S. are at an all-time low.  The U.S. Census Bureau recently found that there are roughly 7 per 1000 citizens getting married, and according to the American Psychological Association, about 40 to 50 percent of married couples in the U.S. get divorced. Analytically, the fear associated with marriage in young people today can be understood. This is why rushing into commitment before getting that degree might be asinine. A 2015 report by the U.S Wedding Forecast from Demographic Intelligence preludes that the millennial marriage rate is expected to decline more over the next 10 years.

Similar findings by the Pew Research Center show that 25 percent of millennials are likely to abstain from marriage altogether. Statistically, this data identifies our generation as the one to break completely away from tradition when it comes to the institution. We’re getting married at the lowest rates in U.S. history because society doesn’t seem as sold on the idea as it once was. It may just be because success and accomplishment seem much more important and appealing than the possibility of divorce.

Although there are a lot of key factors that could determine the lasting period of a marriage, it can’t be determined whether it’s best for a person to become practiced in relationships beforehand, or if it’s better to just not get tied down during college. Maybe if young people became more educated about marital practice before getting hitched then the divorce rate would go down.

Marital commitment should wait until after a person has started their career so that there are less emotional distractions from a person being able to reach their full potential. Furthermore, people should only commit to each other after they’ve discovered all they need to know about themselves. The more intimately you know someone over time, the more their flaws become apparent to you, and this is a main reason why marriages fail. You can believe wholeheartedly that you’re in love with someone until you see who they become at their lowest points, such as during economic hardship or pressure.

Although it’s taking millennials a bit longer to develop an identity for ourselves and get married, the recorded number of Americans postponing marriages today might be viewed by some as the elevation of post-secondary institution within our culture. A lot of baby-boomers think it’s good that young people aren’t rushing into marriage anymore. The 50 percent divorce rate stat, however, is seen as just a myth to some.

“Divorce is not the biggest threat to marriage. Discouragement is,” Shaunti Feldhahn said in her book “The Good News about Marriage: Debunking Discouraging Myths about Marriage and Divorce.”

Love, though flawed at times, is unconditional in every aspect. It’s choosing to be with someone in spite of their vices. If a person can’t understand their own desire well enough to have an informed preference when it comes to dating, then they’re set up to fail at relationships.

That’s just the way it is. The convenience of commitment in college makes the concept of love abstract and only leads to regret later in life.

This is why millennials need to first expand upon their own identity and learn how to live with themselves first.

Trying to force a lifetime bond without doing so will not only lead to a failed marriage, but also unsuccessfulness.