I have come to the point in my life where I am noticing my growth as both a human, but also as a member of society. As with many people who find themselves reaching adulthood, I can see myself in comparison to how I once was, I can look over the mistakes I made and readjust my decisions based on my life. I feel though that I have fallen into the metamorphosis of one’s parents. 

You may have heard the crisis of someone who fears to turn into their parent, scared for the life that it may lead. I previously said one’s parents because my fear is not that of turning into my dad, but someone else’s dad. My question is then who’s dad have I become and can someone help me find them. 

My first notice was my unhealthy obsession with beer. Not drinking it, but talking about beer. 

I find myself too often going to a brewery and explaining to my less than impressed friends the meaning of IBU and what’s the difference between a lager and a sour. I have not been 21 years of age for that long, so where has this wellspring of knowledge not only come from but why have I decided to spew it out of my mouth? Now, on the plus side, I would never approach a stranger on some dominance power play but I’m sure my friends are either annoyed or worried.

Second point of terror would be my sleep schedule.

Gone are the nights of staying up until 2 a.m. and waking up moments before class. Now I am in bed before midnight and waking up at 7 a.m., even without anything to actually do that early. I even have more of a flexible schedule that would support a more drastic sleep schedule, but I just can’t find it in myself to force myself awake just for my own pride’s sake. 

I am not even staying up doing anything worth noting, I am either working or reading. Not a whole point of concern, but I do read way more than I did in the past, although I can’t complain because reading is actually cool.

Finally, is my addiction to sports.

I have always been involved with sports. I have always been a Detroit Lions and Red Wings fan, and always keep to date on standing and scores, but never committing time to watch games or even talk about it to friends. Now every Sunday is holy but not in the prospect of religion, but to football. I even know players on other teams and spend time reading articles on player stats and status. 

I am concerned not only because of what I am becoming, but also as I do not know who this person is. I feel like I am searching for a father figure at a very late time in my life. I am conflicted and concerned about how to move forward.