Top 5 Women’s

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5. If you’re interested in some great graffiti, and are really feeling the need to pee, the bathroom on the first floor of the LRC is just what you’re looking for. Each stall is graced with statements ranging from “Lisa is a (lady of the night)” to “I love peeing.” Some stalls even have a little poetry, adding an air of scholarly appeal to this otherwise smelly place. And if you have a friend you haven’t seen in a while, think about stopping in this bathroom, where you’re sure to have an awkward interaction with that one girl you once had to work on a group project with two semesters ago. You may not remember her name, but you’ll definitely remember how she didn’t do any of the work.

4. One of the little known bathrooms on campus is located in that tiny grove of trees just past the Heart of Northern. With NMU located right in the middle of beautiful Marquette, Mich., it’s no wonder that many students like to spend their weekends out in the woods, camping and hiking. But, for most students, those five days between weekends can be difficult to get through without a little trek through the forest. This is where the grove of trees comes in handy. It allows you to believe you’re actually in the forest, and offers just enough protection that you can let a little liquid go without fear of being seen. And there’s plenty of leaves to go around.

3. The legendary NMU “Lavatory Lingerer” has been spotted in many a bathroom on campus, so the No. 3 spot was reserved for any bathroom in which she can be found. Most people who see her only get a glimpse of her indistinctive shoes, but anyone’s who’s spotted her knows exactly who she is. Often, she’ll stay in the stall for over an hour, making no discernible noises or movements. “I saw her once. It was awesome, kind of like seeing a yeti or something,” said Gail Gawkoo, a senior photography major. “I took a photo of her shoes, so I would have proof for my friends. Then I left, but I came back an hour later, after class, and she was still in there. I hope she didn’t die in there.”

2. Walking through the doors of the bathroom in the library, one can’t help but notice how this bathroom sets itself apart from the rest. To start with, it’s certainly much quieter than any other bathroom on campus, relieving women from having to listen to the typical bathroom talk: Girl 1 – “He said he wants to go out with his friends tonight. Can you believe that? His friends. So that was it. I told him it’s over.” Girl 2 – “Damn right. You deserve better than that.” But what makes this bathroom No. 2 is its perfect placement. Anyone with high library fees looking to steal a book can stop in here to prep themselves before making a break for the second floor to nab that copy of “Why alcohol turns your liver to mush” so you can run right through those ridiculously loud detectors and back to your dorm room to finish that useless term paper for HP 200 you’ve been putting off.

1. And the best women’s bathroom on campus, hands down, is the bathroom with the couches located on the second floor of the University Center. Because, let’s be honest here, who doesn’t want to sit down and take a load off after dropping a load off. The atmosphere of relaxation is set as soon as you step through the doors. The flower patterned furniture, the seashells along the basically useless shelf and the full length mirror cleverly placed so you can make sure no toilet paper is stuck to your shoe are all a part of what makes this bathroom No. 1. While there is basically no graffiti on any of the stalls, each toilet seems to be in working order, and the soap and paper towel dispensers are usually filled. So, if you’re anywhere up campus and Mother Nature calls, think, “U.C.”